Weaning Off Breastfeeding: A Helpful Guide Through This Transition

For many moms, the end of breastfeeding can bring a mix of emotions: relief, sadness, pride, guilt, excitement, and even grief. That's because weaning is more than just a feeding transition. It's the closing of one chapter of motherhood and the beginning of another.

But before focusing on the end, lactation consultant Leila Nassar, with Lehigh Valley Health Network, part of Jefferson Health, wants moms to remember one thing: You did an amazing job.

“Any amount of breast milk you give to your child is phenomenal,” Nassar says. “As a lactation consultant and a mom, I've had emotional conversations with so many mothers, and I remind them over and over again of the incredible job they did, just for starting breastfeeding and for giving their babies breast milk – no matter how long the journey lasted."

When it’s time for your breastfeeding to come to an end, here’s helpful guidance, tips and need-to-know information that will help you with this major transition.

The short answer? It's personal.

"The right time to wean is when it's best for your baby, your life situation, and your mental health," Nassar says.

While there is no universal “perfect” age to stop breastfeeding, the decision should take into account both the child's needs and the mother's well-being.

“If mental health is becoming an issue and breastfeeding is causing significant distress, that's when you should consider weaning,” says obstetrician and gynecologist Alexis Achey Lewis, DO, with LVPG Obstetrics and Gynecology–Fogelsville, part of Jefferson Health. “We need to make sure mom is mentally and emotionally well because the benefits of having a healthy, supported mother ultimately outweigh the benefits of breast milk alone.”

For mothers facing medical concerns, weaning may not always be necessary. 

“If a doctor recommends medication for a medical condition, make sure they are aware how important it is for you to continue breastfeeding, and ask whether a breastfeeding-compatible option is available,” Dr. Achey Lewis says. “Depending on the medication, the age of your child, and how often they nurse, breastfeeding can sometimes continue safely.”

For some moms, weaning brings unexpected emotions. The reason is partly biological. Breastfeeding influences hormones such as prolactin and oxytocin, which play a role in mood, relaxation, and bonding. As breastfeeding decreases, hormone levels shift, which can contribute to emotional ups and downs.

“Some women experience symptoms similar to the ‘baby blues’ during weaning,” Dr. Achey Lewis says. “While a mother is breastfeeding, her body remains in a unique postpartum hormonal state. As weaning begins, those hormonal adjustments can feel like a new postpartum transition, even months or years after giving birth. If you’re struggling with the hormonal shift, reach out to your doctor for help. They may suggest going on an oral contraception, which can help with mood and with decreasing your milk supply.”

At the same time, many moms are grieving the end of a relationship that has been a significant part of daily life.

“Moms often feel guilt, shame, sadness, or loss,” Nassar says. “You have to grieve that journey, facing all the emotions it may bring up.”

The good news? These feelings are common, and they are temporary for most women. Many moms report feeling emotionally better within a few weeks after weaning, although hormone changes can continue longer.

One worry many breastfeeding moms share is that stopping breastfeeding means losing the special connection they share with their baby. However, that connection breastfeeding may have established doesn’t disappear when nursing ends.

“The umbilical cord is cut, and then you still have breastfeeding. Once that's gone, some moms feel like the cord is officially cut,” Nassar says. “But breastfeeding is only one part of motherhood, and moms do not need to breastfeed their baby to be connected to their baby. The importance of bringing a child into the world is to love them and watch them grow. Not all of that comes from breastfeeding.”

The bond between parent and child is built through countless moments: cuddles, bedtime stories, comforting tears, celebrating milestones, and simply showing up every day.

“Whether you're a breastfeeding mom or a formula-feeding mom doesn't define you,” Nassar says. “What defines you is being a mother and providing love and care for your child.”

One of the most important things to know about weaning is that there is no one-size-fits-all approach. But in most cases, experts recommend weaning gradually rather than stopping suddenly.

Nassar says there are many factors that affect the weaning process, including:

• Your baby's age
• How often your baby nurses
• Whether you're nursing directly or pumping
• Your milk supply
• Your reason for weaning
• Whether you or your baby is ready to wean

Moms with a larger milk supply may take longer to fully wean, and some women may continue leaking small amounts of milk for months after breastfeeding has ended.

“When you’re weaning, there is no magic pill that dries your milk up quickly,” Nassar says, “In time, when you wean slowly, your body will absorb the milk and dry it up.”

For pumping moms, the weaning process is often more straightforward.

Begin by gradually shortening pumping sessions while maintaining the same pumping schedule. Then slowly drop one pumping session at a time, gradually reducing the total number of pumps a day over several days or weeks.

“The weaning process should be slow – unless it’s an urgent need,” Nassar says. “I recommend two-day increments where every two days you take one thing away – starting with cutting down on the amount of time you pump during each session, then slowly weaning off one pump at a time. Aim to do this over a two-week time span. However, listen to your body. Don’t be afraid to take the process even slower if it feels right for you.”

For babies who nurse at the breast, weaning involves more than milk. It also means replacing comfort, routine, and connection.

Some families find that taking away one nursing session every few days works well, while others need a slower pace.

Nassar encourages parents to offer distractions when skipping a feeding session, such as:

• Favorite toys
• Books
• Snacks
• Water or milk
• Outdoor activities
• One-on-one playtime

“It’s important for moms to know the weaning process isn't hard on the baby – it’s hard on the mother,” Nassar says. “Children are resilient and designed to adapt.”

Weaning can cause breast fullness and discomfort. Nassar recommends several strategies that can help make the process more comfortable:

• Use ice packs to reduce swelling and pain.
• Wear a supportive bra.
• Stay hydrated.
• Rest whenever possible.
• Elevate your legs and avoid unnecessary heavy lifting.
• Hand express a small amount of milk for comfort if needed.
• Sleep on your back when possible.

Some moms also find relief with chilled cabbage leaves applied to the breasts.

Certain substances may decrease milk production, including mint, menthol and sage tea. Mothers should always discuss medications and herbal remedies with their healthcare clinician.

While gradual weaning lowers the risk of complications, moms should watch for signs of serious issues such as a breast infection like mastitis or clogged ducts. This includes:

• Redness
• Warmth
• Breast pain
• Fever
• Flu-like symptoms

“If any of these symptoms occur, contact your OB-GYN or healthcare clinician promptly so they can prescribe you antibiotics if necessary, or perform an ultrasound to help eliminate any clogs,” Dr. Achey Lewis says.

You don't have to navigate weaning alone. Partners, family members, friends, lactation consultants, and clinicians can all play an important role. In some cases, babies may accept bottles, cups, or bedtime routines more easily from another caregiver during the weaning process because they don't associate that person with breastfeeding.

“This is a family transition and now is the time to lean on your village,” Nassar says. “It’s important for moms to have a discussion with their partners that it’s going to be about two weeks – give or take – of a lot of resting for mom. This means little if any housework or heavy lifting, and truly resting. So now is the time for your partner and the other people in your village to step up.” 

From handling bedtime, offering feeds, helping with household responsibilities, or simply listening, support can make a tremendous difference.

As weaning unfolds, try to remember what you've already accomplished. You nourished your baby. You comforted your baby. You showed up day after day through sleepless nights, growth spurts, challenges, and milestones. And now, you're helping your child grow into the next phase of life.

“Wherever your journey is, it's an amazing and beautiful journey,” Nassar says. “You should be proud of yourself. Look in the mirror and think of the amazing woman you are. Your baby is always going to love you.”

While breastfeeding journeys end, motherhood never does.